The Colossus Of Rhodes

One of the now-vanished Seven World Wonders, The Colossus of Rhodes was this mammoth statue of the Greek sun god, Helios. Artisans of the city of Rhodes, on an island with the same name, built him out at the harbor’s entrance as a tribute, hoping that Helios would protect all ships from bad weather. 

He was built between 292-280 BC. He was comprised of primarily bronze and iron, standing atop a fifty foot tall, marble base. He was about 105 feet tall. 

In 226 BC the tectonic plates near Greece, making a good-faith effort to honor the rest of the planet by heeding their words at a recent intervention, was going through some severe withdrawl. The plate felt the wine being spilled on its surface. It developed a severe case of the shakes. 

The Colossus came a-tumbling down fifty-four years after it was completed.

Now, truly nothing says Rivalless like spending twelve years to create something wondrous, to find it destroyed one day!

Did you know that a burning piece of wood emits exactly the same heat and light as the tree absorbed making it?

I have no idea what’s hip. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have teased you this way.

Part of my issue is that there are several, really incredible sketches and works of art depicting the Colossus. I ultimately would love to make use of all of them. However, I don’t think anyone really knows any of these images and immediately thinks – “Colossus of Rhodes.” 

That makes it challenging to introduce a new concept as, “Colossal!” out of the box. I would love for this concept to be completely self-evident. And, I guess once you know where you’re shopping, it is…

Your progress through this post:
Doneness 18%

Dammit, Tim! We haven't got much time!

Days
Hours
Minutes
Seconds

But, I am struggling!

One evening I was perusing the single most-visited website I have going in my life; tld-list.com. If you are unfamiliar, it’s a super-quick, super-easy way to look up things like, “I wonder if anyone has the URL, “OhBoyIllinois.com,” or what’s the cheapest place to register. Also, a fanboy of vanity domains – obviously – tld-list.com opened my eyes to a whole realm of possibilities to scoop vanity domains.

I saw that .club domains were only 99¢. A few obvious ideas hit me – Night.club is taken. Health.club is taken. Fan.club is taken.

I chuckled and thought about BigDick.Club. Taken.

GiantDick.Club? Taken.

MonsterCock.club? Available!

Then, as I scrambled to register my amusing new domain, a truly Rivalless moment occurred and it hit me.

And so, Colossal Cock Club was born!

Now, I’m far from professional at graphics but I’m thousands of hours better-practiced at it than I was at the start of the year. Getting to THIS point was a solid ninety minutes of work.

I’ve poured dozens of hours into art for Colossal Cock Club. All of which, I will share below. I mean, this is a solid fifty hours worth of random efforts. 

My issue is, I am unsure which direction to go, artistically.

None Genuine Without Mention Here

They only let me put text in a toggle?! Gotta be able to do other stuff…

In the portion of the world known as “The Internet,” I go by Guy Rivalless.

So, I could – and do currently – have ColossalCock.club forwarded to Guys.ColossalCock.club. Because that’s just so on-the-nose, and there’s nothing that brings me greater anguish than a missed opportunity. But, I’m not sure how far into it I should lean.

I suppose I can do things like make all three available on T-shirts, and see how it goes?

But, I also think about leaving it as simply ColossalCock.club.

However, it’s also too-easy to create the subdomain KendallCounty.ColossalCock.club (It’s there, but there’s nothing).

i think I know...

Having sat here, and thought things through as I create this page – I’m pretty sure the move to go with is leave it as simply ColossalCock.club, and offer things both WITH and WITHOUT the words.

 

My overarching problem

All too-often over the last couple of months, I get fired up for these projects. Beginning of June, I 100%, top to bottom, re-did every pixel of ThePlaidBanana.com. Redrew the banana from scratch. Re-selected colors, redesigned the plaids, redid the store, redid all of the products offered.

In the past ninety days, as of this writing on August 1, 2021 – ThePlaidBanana.com has had 719 visitors. The overwhelming majority of them from Germany. Virtually all of them are Direct Referral – which means someone typed or copy/pasted ThePlaidBanana.com into their address bar. Before the overhaul, I left the default Hello World! post up that comes with a new WordPress install, and it had seven comments. Each spam.

So, my problem is that I spend thousands of hours on all this stuff. The only humans that ever see any of it are tech support when I need help, or spammers from overseas. I haven’t sold a single item yet to anyone not also called Mom.

And I’ve got dozens of stores out there. The issue is, I don’t social media. I’ve got nobody to kick around ideas with. I get no feedback when I come up with three different ideas for MindTheFap.com.

Without money coming in, it’s hard to know which effort is closest to ending with a bank deposit. So, of course, I sometimes go multiple days without touching a computer.

But, ColossalCock.club is one that I really want to tighten up and nail down. To wit; below are the numerous results of the hours committed thus far.

Yeah, I'm a sucker for the diagonal X pattern... 😊

I just learned a thing

Please, peruse all of the ColossalCock.club-related art that’s been generated so far. Then, in the form at the bottom, please share any and all thoughts. Particularly if you know how to do something like run an online store like ColossalCock.club, or Pharmapseudocal.com, or RivallessGarb.com!

Combining these two

To get him

I was pretty sure my stones had dropped as far as they’re going to about 25 years ago. My bags are at my knees after this ordeal!

Tell me - - thoughts?

Not only do I not social media; I don’t social -ize. So type words and give me a small endorphin rush! For real, dude. I appreciate your time.

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